When you’re a total stupid dumbass

who absent-mindedly takes your Saturday PM meds when you wake up at 5:00 on a Monday and then a few hours later you take your Monday AM meds and quickly send yourself spiraling into a painful, disorienting, blinding, terrifying—but ultimately non-threatening—double-dose overdose situation last week so your mom devises a brilliant MomGyver fail-safe using nothing but rubber bands and a butter knife to save you from your stupid self in the future.

Also: While most of these pills are supplements to enhance the efficacy of my psych meds, the collective volume of psychotropic and supplemental pills has finally reached a critical mass that obligates me to take them in two shifts instead of in my usual badass single-fistful gulp.